I grew up in the 80s. If you wanted to talk to someone you only had a couple of options: In Person, Via Snail Mail, or Over the Phone.
I talked with my classmates in person every day at school. We’d tell jokes, work on projects, and just be kids.
I had a couple of failed attempts at pen pals internationally via programs set up by my church or school. I’d always write but never get anything back outside of say birthday cards from my grandparents.
Then there was the phone.
It was expensive to have a phone line at home in the 80s. Long-distance was prohibitively expensive. That meant we would only be able to make local calls.
My friends were all close enough that we’d just hang out in person. My grandparents and other assorted family lived out of state so calls with them were quick and only around the holidays.
That means I’d only use the phone to call the local Library story line or joke line. It was a one-way sort of thing. Reminded me of a radio show, but over the phone. I could listen but never had to speak. Once in a great while, we’d order pizzas for family movie night. My dad always did that. He loved talking with people over the phone or in person.
I don’t know where my aversion to phone calls came from. I’ve used the phone more and more often as I’ve gotten older. Jobs have required it. My kids in school have required it. Being an adult, in general, has required it for car repair shop calls, scheduling doctor’s appointments, etc.
I’m not holding on to some horrible experience in the past with a particularly traumatic phone call. Having conversations on the phone with people I know well isn’t a problem for me either. I talk to my mom on the phone regularly for example. She doesn’t text really.
Video calls don’t fill me with anxiety like voice-only calls do either. Maybe it’s because I can see facial expressions and read people’s reactions better that way.
I would rather not eat than order takeout over the phone.
This becomes evident every time my wife wants to order takeout from our local Chinese place. They don’t have a website. They don’t do social media. They don’t do online orders of any sort. Even the sketchy places that add restaurant menus and do food delivery without a restaurant’s authorization don’t have this place online. It’s good food though, so we order from there semi-regularly.
The first time we tried the place I flat out refused to order over the phone because I hate doing so. My wife also wouldn’t call but was super hungry. She too hates phone calls. So I drove over to the restaurant and ordered in person. Waited for the food to cook. Paid and went on my way.
That took “too long” though according to my wife so I’ve started ordering over the phone. The staff is always polite. There has yet to be an error in the order. Still, I only order like that (over the phone) when my wife is home. When she travels? I won’t eat out or I’ll order in person.
I’ve put off car repairs for weeks or doctor’s appointments for months because there isn’t a way to make an appointment online that works for my schedule. I only call when I’m forced to by necessity and by exhausting all other possible avenues first.
This is weird, right? Or do you also hate phone calls? Let me know in the comments or on social.